Suspect Stops At In-N-Out In Middle Of Pursuit And I Don’t Blame Him

Chandler, Arizona – A man ran from police Wednesday and stopped at In-N-Out during the pursuit.

( Article originally published at https://bluelivesmatter.blue/in-n-out-pursuit/ )

35 year old Joshua Adkins was charged with suspicion of unlawful flight from law enforcement, aggravated assault domestic violence, and unlawful imprisonment. Police in unmarked vehicles followed the man for several miles, reaching some pretty high speeds during the pursuit. The officers probably didn’t want to activate their lights and risk making the pursuit worse.

As Adkins was driving along, contemplating going to jail, he witnessed something beautiful: In-N-Out. He probably thought to himself about how terrible prison food was going to be, but being captured by police was definitely worth a delicious Double Double Animal Style, with Animal Style fries and a strawberry shake.

Adkins pulled into the In-N-Out. He knew police were hot on his tail, but this… this was worth it. The giant golden arrow illuminated the night, almost as if it was a beacon for salvation, it was glorious. As he pulled into the parking lot he could already smell the seducing aroma of the delicious french fries. The smell reminded him of the time he thought that he wasn’t getting the very much sought after Stretch Arm Strong for Christmas because his parents gave him a shoe box. But upon opening it, he found true happiness.

Adkins ordered his food, “This is the last good meal that I’ll have for a while,” he thought. As he pulled up to the drive threw window and peeked a glimpse at the mustard-cooked, all natural beef patties sizzling on the grill, the guilt of what he had done the past few hours hit him, “I don’t deserve this”.

Adkins drove away without his food. A few miles down the road, another thought hit him. “Prison food is going to suck,” he spotted a house off of the road he was on and jumped out of his truck. “Surely this residence must have mustard and all beef patties, I’ll make myself a burger!”. He was again let down though when he ran into the back yard, put his hand on the door knob, and realized it was locked. Overcome with the grief of his crimes, Adkins surrendered to the local law enforcement officers who had witnessed the harrowing ordeal in its entirety.

Seriously though, In-N-Out is great. With officers losing their lives all the time to suspects trying to escape capture, it would be reasonable to put an In-N-Out in every town to deter people like this.